My photo
I'm not here to inspire doubt, only to provoke thought.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

The Exposure.

             There comes that moment in every relationship. When the honeymoon portion of the relationship runs thin and you start to see the transparent parts of each other. There is discovery in this portion, you learn how far you can go on certain things, how far they can go on certain things and whether or not it right for you. I call this period the exposure. Some people reach it quick, for others it can take years. They are big moments, like the first fight, the first time you cry, the first time you look at the other person without the pure intent to be nice to them.
           The older I get oddly enough, this is the time I treasure the most. I've been to enough rodeos to know that  this is the real deal. It's easy to get along with a lot of people in the beginning. It's lite risk, like putting 5 on a hand off blackjack and coming up. It's fun and easy. Sit in on that table game for a while and shit will get real. You'll see the people who know when they have a good thing and take it for what it is, and you will also find those that will be continuously chasing their loses. 
       The exposure is about being who you really are and having someone look at you after the amazing date were you both dressed up and had cocktails and laughed and put your best foot forward. Little did you know someone roofied both your drinks and you would later have to beat each other to the toilet for the rest of the evening after everyone publicly watch you vomit on your new dress (true story of a true friend). Then waking up next to one another with dick breathe and just being able to still love and laugh. After all of that. That is where truly the good stuff comes from. The trust is built on those moments. Moments of vulnerability. When we aren't seen at our best, in fact even maybe a step below our worst. Two things will be seen, the will to stay or the chance to leave. This period of time is what will pave the way for the rest of our lives in our relationships. Whether we choose to be alone or choose to share ourselves with another.
       So my ending thought on this is, don't be scared off by these rough patches and if you are (you are a huge pussy) not ready to give to someone else and don't waste your time or theirs. Everyone gets a bad day and needs someone on their team. You choose to be there and vice versa. Because let me tell you being single is awesome no doubt, but there is close to nothing more fulfilling in the world then knowing you threw up in your own purse the night before, rolling over and the man who bought it for you will still reach over and want to snuggle the shit outta you. It might not be how Shakespeare portrayed it, but friends it's the facts. 

I hope all of you, no matter what have someone on your team.

1 comment:

  1. Ah yes the honeymoon phase. Always fun. Some are lucky if they make it after that phase. Now a days I'm lucky if someone will let their guard down enough to find out the real them cause they've been jilted from a previous relationship. I find girls that say 'Fuck. I have to find a man with money.' Once I hear that I'm like is that what it takes now? Money is the only important thing now? Fuck loyalty, love and trust. Money! Though I'm sure they're just saying that out of hatered from the last guy that did her wrong. I'm sure guys have their same version of that. Its either 1) fuck relationships I'm going to fuck as many girls as I can or 2) fuck why am I still not over her. I don't even know where I'm going with any of this.

    I think at this point I'm stuck in between wanting to be in a relationship and not. The part of a relationship I miss the most after the honeymoon phase is the daily phone call. Just to talk. See how their day is going or how is work. As you say someone on your team. When its dead between 3 to 8 in the morning I wish had somwe one to talk to. Watching Netflix by yourself is not fun. It been 10 months now and almost a 30 year old boy. I should have a stable relationship by now. At least I think I should. Problem is I don't go out as much anymore. I'm tired of the club and bar scene. Well I go to bars but my sole purpose is to drink and have a good time. I know it fairytale then anything but I wish I could look across the room at a bookstore and see her and be like yeah or her be standing next to me and just somehow start talking about what we're looking for. Like I said fairytale. Maybe the cashier or hostess at a restaurant.

    OK that went somewhere else. Back the to after the honeymoon phase. Like you that part is the fun time for me cause you get to really know them. I call it the relationship chicken phase. See if one is going to give the other that Oh moment. Me I'm an open book. As you can see from all that rambling from before. If you ask I'll answer. I have nothing to hide and nothing to gain from lying. To have someone to go on embarrassing adventures with. Shit I'm pretty good and doing that by myself. For example like today in Tahoe. Jumped into the lake and I'm not exactly the fitest looking guy but and made these two girls laugh so fucking hard flopping around like a fish in the shallow part. It was great. Also posed like a statue fountain squirting water from my mouth. At this point why should I care. I'm just being me. So when I hear people past stories that they are embarrassed or ashamed of I don't judge cause chances are I have a few myself.

    On that note I hope I find my teammate some day.